Have you ever attended a wedding that was ruined by a screaming child? If not, consider yourself very lucky! Every bride wants a picture perfect wedding, and many are inclined to think that a Picture Esq Wedding always equals “No Kids Allowed”. Although it is fine to request that children not attend your ceremony, couples that DO want kids at their event are often confused as to what can be done. Brides always wonder what steps they can take to ensure a child does not ruin their ceremony.
Let’s look at the question from a Sigmund Freud different perspective. First of all, it is natural for a child to become restless while sitting for long periods of time. Asking a child to sit silently for 2 or 3 hours during an activity that they are not a part of is like asking an adult to not sing along while attending their favorite concert! The point is that people by nature want to be apart of “the show.” Concert goers aren’t apart of the band, but they want to feel involved by cheering and singing along. Similarly, children at weddings can sometimes feel disengaged during the ceremony, which is why they tend to cry or whine for attention. The key to involving kids in weddings is to make sure they feel apart of the event. Here are a few tips that can help any child from ruining your wedding day:
Give a child a role or duty in the ceremony:
This is the most obvious tip to get a child involved in a wedding. There are many different roles in a wedding ceremony that can be done by children of all ages. Look over this list of roles that both a girl or a boy of any age can play in a wedding. If you do decide on involving a child in your wedding be sure to take some of these points in mind:
- Do you or a friend have extra time to practice the child’s role in the wedding?
- Does the child have stage fright?
- Should I plan on someone accompanying the child to help them complete their role?
*some kids can get intimidated by large crowds watching them
* A 2yr old flower girl is much cuter holding the hand of an adult walking in the right direction
Have a child help prepare for your wedding:
Your goal is to make sure the kids at your wedding feel involved. Ask the children to help decorate your reception venue, assemble your wedding favors, or with any other wedding preparation task. Even though the children might not be involved in the actual ceremony, they will still have a sense of pride in helping put together such a huge event! The kids will feel important when guests start to compliment on how beautiful the wedding is. Showing a child that he or she was crucial in the preparation of such an important event will persuade them to respect the moment and behave better.
Include a list of “Quiet Games” in your invitations:
A great way to make a child feel engaged during a wedding ceremony is to incorporate a game into your event. Create a list of games that can be played quietly at your wedding and include the list in your wedding invitations. To make the activity more interesting, let the children know that the winner of the game will receive a prize at the end of the wedding reception!
Some great quiet game ideas are:
- Tell the kids to keep track of how many times the bride and groom’s names are said aloud.
- Ask the kids to name an “X” number of guests at your wedding.
- Think of something unique at your wedding ( a flower, certain decoration, specific color, etc.) and ask the kids to count how many of the object they find at your wedding.
These games may sound boring at first but during a long quiet ceremony they can children attentively entertained.
Making a child feel involved is the key to keeping them well behaved during a wedding ceremony. However, the effectiveness of the tips above still depend on each individual parent and child. If you allow children at your ceremony, make sure that you are confident that their parents are aware of your expectations. It is important that all guests ( adults and children) respect the level of formality that you want for your wedding.
Do you Know of any other tips? Let us know the way you’ve gotten your child to sit still without a peep during a wedding ceremony.
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